Phone Call

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Caller: Is (owner) there? Me: No sorry he's not may I take a message? Caller: Well this is (business), no message needed, I'll just go ahead and call another company. (click). You know, instead of being a bitch you could have just said no message, I'll call back later. Some other asshole called this morning and got all pissy with me because I didn't refer to him as "Dr." I said "Mr." instead. He says, "Its Dr. (asshole)" I say, "Oh pardon me...DR." In the most condescending voice I could muster up. I'm aggravated as fuck today. 1. Because the Packers lost real fuckin bad last night, and 2. This is the last day of work for me before we go out of town for 4 days.

1 comments • at 9:08 AM

Tasty

Posted by DonkeyPuncher

Well, nobody seems to post here anymore, so I thought I'd share this with you to keep things going. I hope you like tasty foods:

http://www.cracked.com/article_14979_6-most-terrifying-foods-in-world.html

3 comments • at 1:45 PM

Dear Dumb Office Bitch

Posted by Mr. Bungle

I understand you wear transition glasses. I also understand that those particular glasses actually go darker quicker when you go outside than they return to normal when you go inside. This is what I don't understand. Why in the fuck do you think that you are so goddamn funny? Because every single time you come in from the office from being outside you have to say "Who turned out the lights?" with a shit-eating grin on your face? It wasn't funny the first fifteen times you said it this month.

1 comments • at 4:36 PM

Grand Theft Auto IV

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Christ am I the only one who doesn't give a fuck about GTA IV? Everyone and their mom apparently is playing this game. The last one was way too much anyways, and this one is about 3 times the amount of shit you have to do. I really don't have the time or the will to go through all of it.

1 comments • at 1:47 PM

Dumb Co-workers.

Posted by Mr. Bungle

This broad at my work (the same one I've posted about before), was reading something out loud and pronounced New Delhi, India, New Del-High. What a fuckin' nin-cow-poop.

1 comments • at 12:39 PM

hot chicks w/ douchebags

Posted by DonkeyPuncher

so that wasn't exactly what I was expecting... I actually thought of "pissbags" or "colostomy bags" when I saw that, so I expected to see hot broads with pissbags... rather disappointed.

3 comments • at 5:51 PM

Update

Posted by Mr. Bungle

First of all, I really have started to enjoy fucking with telemarketers at work. Its one of my new passions in life. I'm sorry for the lack of updates, but I originally wanted to put this blog up for other people to write in also, but it has not happened. I thought this would be a good place for all my witty friends to rant about shit they think is funny or don't like, but they have shown a lack of interest. I'm going to change the name of the blog. Hopefully more people will read and post eventually.

0 comments • at 3:23 PM

Obama's Church of Slurs

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Story Here

Since when are people judged by things that one of their crazy friends said? Goddamn politics. Its not about who is the best person for the job anymore, its about who talks the most shit on the other one. All politicians are fucking corrupt in some way or another. I hate that people nitpick each other over stupid shit, and the fact that he has to defend himself over something someone else said is fucking retarded.

3 comments • at 8:32 AM

You Know You're A Redneck If..

Posted by Mr. Bungle

You Know You're A Redneck If Your Wife Is Quoted In The Local Paper Saying...

Rednecks are awesome. For entertainment purposes that is.

0 comments • at 10:02 AM

Brett Favre Retires

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Story Here

Well being a fan I can't say honestly that I didn't see this coming. I mean he broke all Dan "Laces Out" Marino's records last season. Still though, I'm sad to see him go. He will be missed my fans of football, and especially Packers fans like me. But I think Madden will miss him the most. He's probably on suicide watch right now as we speak.

2 comments • at 8:57 AM

Government and Baseball

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Story Here

Doesn't the government have anything better to do than screw with baseball athletes because their rules regarding performance enhancing drugs was a bit lax? Especially screwing with players that are retired is retarded. Just leave the shit alone and go take care of some other shit that I'm sure is more important.

1 comments • at 12:39 PM

Dumb Co-Workers

Posted by Mr. Bungle

One of my co-workers just said to me, "Your a pest-amistic". When I was referring to how the sun being out would not last due to the heavy storm. Jesus. **eyegouge**

0 comments • at 11:00 AM

Lyndon LaRouche Sees Microsoft Conspiracy in NIU Shooting

Posted by Mr. Bungle

GamePolitics.com » Blog Archive » Lyndon LaRouche Sees Microsoft Conspiracy in NIU Shooting

Yeah because going off his meds didn't make him go ape shit, it was all video games fault! Damn you video games! Kiss my ass LaDouche.

0 comments • at 11:17 AM

ABC and huge logos.

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Anyone else notice that when watching TV shows these days your forced to look at an ad for some new upcoming show in the corner the whole time? As if the 5 million commercials for the show run during the TV program isn't enough? Last night watching ABC the logo at the bottom for the Oscars takes over the entire corner. Yeah I KNOW the Oscars are going to be on, you only shove it down my throat every 10 minutes.

1 comments • at 7:16 AM

Google Rejection Letter

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Hello XXXXX,

Thank you for your interest in Google AdSense. Unfortunately, after
reviewing your application, we're unable to accept you into Google AdSense
at this time.

We did not approve your application for the reasons listed below.

Issues:

- Page type

---------------------

Further detail:

Page type: We're unable to approve your AdSense application at this time
because we feel that your site does not comply with the Google webmaster
quality guidelines. More specifically, we believe that your site does not
add value or provide unique content. For a complete list of the webmaster
guidelines, please visit
http://www.google.com/support/webmasters/bin/answer.py?answer=35769 .


I am offended.  Well not really.  I didn't realize that they could make a decision about what kind of content adds "Value" or not.  Its their opinion I suppose.

0 comments • at 7:13 AM

If Nicaraguan kids were smart!

Posted by Quagmire

They would sell this stuff on eBay. Of course they may need a computer to do so.

http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=3247804

Story Below.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MANAGUA, Nicaragua -- The New England Patriots won the Super Bowl and ended the season with a perfect 19-0 record -- at least it looks that way in Nicaragua.

The NFL donated 290 Patriots hats and an equal number of team jerseys trumpeting the slogans "Super Bowl Champions, 19-0" to impoverished children from two small communities in southern Nicaragua.

Thursday's gifts could not change history -- the Patriots lost the Feb. 3 game to the New York Giants 17-14 -- but they made a lot of youngsters in the communities of San Gregorio and Buena Vista very happy, said Miriam Diaz, spokeswoman for the humanitarian organization World Vision, which arranged the donation with the NFL.

"They [Patriots] lost, but the children won," Diaz said.

The only "football" most of the children know is soccer, but they were very enthusiastic about the U.S. version of the game once the rules were explained to them, she said.

"They were very happy to receive the hats and jerseys," Diaz said. "They said they did not expect such a surprise."

Neither did the Patriots.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So glad the Pats lost!!!

0 comments • at 3:08 PM

Outback Steak House Can Suck It.

Posted by Mr. Bungle

So this year the wife and I decided that we would go for a little change of pace for Valentines day. We usually go to Tony Roma's. I don't really know why, we just do. Anyways. So last week I call to make reservations at Outback Steak House. Donkey Puncher had given us a gift card for them last year for our wedding and we enjoyed it. (Btw I feel a little bit like Bill Cosby telling this story) NOW, I went ahead and told them on the phone my first AND last name because I knew there would be 10 million other people with my first name getting reservations. I even spelled it out to the girl on the phone. She read it back to me and I made sure she had it. Great. So we get to the restaurant last night. I see all the people huddled up inside the little space in between the first two doors, and a gang of people inside. The girl at the front door informs me when I get to her that there is a 1 hr and 40 min wait. Good thing I have a reservation! She asked for my name. Then she scans the list and says, "Oh, they must have it up front." So I go up to the front. "She didn't have it back there?" Uhhh, no. "I can't seem to find it, its not on here. When did you call ahead?" Like a week ago. "Well just hang on for about 10-15 min and we will call you, since we ran out of pagers." Ok great. Well after 20 min of being outside in the cold wind we decided to say fuck it. Quoting Seinfeld, "The problem is you can't KEEP the reservation." Happy Valentines day from Jack in the Box! Outback can suck it.

1 comments • at 9:17 AM

Co-Workers and Children

Posted by Mr. Bungle

I don't know if there is anything more annoying than co-workers giving their children "Hugs and Kisses" over the phone. And I'm not talking about saying "Hugs and Kisses", I mean actually making the hugging and kissing noises over the phone. Why is it illegal to punch people in the face for such atrocities.

1 comments • at 11:16 AM

Awesome Craigslist Post

Posted by Mr. Bungle

3445t0p.jpg (JPEG Image, 933x625 pixels)

0 comments • at 8:14 AM

What is the deal with hemorrhoids?

Posted by DonkeyPuncher

In my best Jerry Seinfeld voice...

This has been a test of the EPT system

0 comments • at 10:45 AM

Tales of a Gym Locker Room.

Posted by Mr. Bungle

First of all, I hope I never get to the point in my life where I can sit naked on a bench in a mens locker room and not have any issues. Yesterday there were several people, (mostly old men) just kind of sitting there, not looking disgusted at all. I mean, how many other old men's asses have been planted in that exact same place that you planted your nasty ass? I'm guessing quite a few. Moving on. Let me paint a picture for you. Imagine a man in his early to late 40's. Strutting back and forth from the mirror to his locker. His attire: Mens(?) Jockey briefs with nothing but elastic on the side. He looked like a jacked up version of Patrick Dempsey, with the feathered hair and the permanent 5'oclock shadow. But that's not the kicker. When observing this D-bag I noticed the most disturbing thing of all. He had someone's name tattooed on the small of his back. I almost lost my power bar.

0 comments • at 1:26 PM

Saudi Cops Grab U.S. Woman In Starbucks

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Story here.

These people are supposed to be our allies? Why do we keep giving them money and weapons all the time and this is the way that they treat us? The US better get that lady the hell out of there as soon as possible. See, this is why I don't want to ever go anywhere out of the country except for maybe Canada or Mexico. (And Mexico is pushing it.) I don't want to be the one that they decide to make an example out of, because knowing my luck that would happen.

0 comments • at 12:16 PM

Ebay Taking Away Negative comments.

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Read Full Story here. Are you serious? Now it will be even easier for people to rip you off and not pay you for items. Good job Ebay, way to keep your customers happy. Negative feedback is the only protection you have against that kind of crap.

0 comments • at 7:02 AM

Super Tuesday

Posted by Mr. Bungle

Is it really necessary for networks to break into whatever TV show you happen to be enjoying at the time just to tell you with 0% of precincts reporting they have projected that Hillary Clinton will win California, but they really won't know for sure until tomorrow? Thanks Tim Russert, I can go on with my life now.

0 comments • at 1:25 PM